Ridding Myself Of Trying To Control The Uncontrollables

Let me be the first to tell you, God has been doing some WORK lately.

A super prominent characteristic of my Type A personality is a strong* desire for control over almost everything -- what I do, how I look, who I'm with, you name it. Sometimes I wholeheartedly believe that my way is the right way to do something..

.. ha WRONG.

But recently my prayers have included tear-soaked pillows and loud screams in the car asking God why nothing makes sense and why it seems as if everything is falling apart, just as soon as it started coming together.

And then He gave me this: Luke 9:23. It reads, "Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross DAILY and follow me."

Wow. Convicted.

I've been working overtime trying to force my plans to work, getting frustrated when they don't, and meanwhile I've unknowingly been taking God's power and authority and attempting to make it human-sized.

And trust me, it's hard. It's hard to trust when He has removed things from my life that I thought belonged there, it's hard to trust when He changed my made-in-advance schedules.

But His timing is so perfect. And I am so thankful for it.

He has been showing me these areas of my life where I need to surrender my death-grip from my desire for personal omnipotence over my life and let Him do what He does best -- be God.

He is God, He is so good, and His plan for us is far far greater than anything we could ever desire for ourselves.

Thank you Lord for refining me daily.